I first must say that I didn’t anticipate writing on this blog anymore – not really sure why. I guess I just figured the “experience” of South Africa was coming to an end and that was that. I just pulled up the website to be reminded of what God had done in me this year and decided to post another entry.
I have been home for a week now. It has been good seeing friends and family and catching up with a few people. I anticipated that I would be quite busy and simply excited to be here and catch up with people – I even told my friends back in Cape Town that I figured I would be excited to be here through the holidays and with my sister having a baby (which I am SO excited about) that I would be on a “high” for awhile before beginning to experience this reverse culture shock that I had heard about.
Well, things did not turn out as I expected.
I had my going away party in Cape Town the night before mom and I left. On Tuesday morning, Nov 27th, several of my friends took us to the airport. I cried quite a bit at the airport as I said goodbye to my good friend Siyoli. Once I was on the plane, though, I was distracted and quite excited about going to Paris with mom. We were there for three days before heading back to the states. It was amazing seeing my very pregnant sister and Scott and my friend Carli at the airport to pick us up. On Sunday, I was quite tired, but very happy to get to see everyone – went to Fellowship in the morning and to a baby shower in the afternoon for my sister and then to a family dinner in the evening.
On Monday, I didn’t really have plans. I needed to unpack and wanted to get settled a bit here at home. I had quite a hard day – cried a lot. Tuesday and Wednesday I almost felt emotionless. Thursday I cried even more than Monday. Now I am somewhere between emotionless and crying… if that even makes sense.
I ran into Cliff Grantham at Starbucks (yeah for Starbucks!) on Saturday and was just talking to him a bit about the week. One thing that he mentioned to me was one of his experiences of being in the military. He would be sent off on an assignment… and when he returned, he would be back to a desk job – but the transition was always very hard. When he was on assignment or on the field (not sure what correct term would be), he felt like he was on a mission and his purpose was being fulfilled in some way. It was what he had been trained for… what he worked so hard for. So, when he would return from an assignment, he would almost feel like he lost his sense of purpose.
I think that is a lot of how I feel… loss of a sense of purpose. I know that God has a plan and purpose for me, but I am not sure what He has for me next. I miss Cape Town and my friends there. I know that I will adjust back over time.
I have not even begun to look for a job yet. I am pretty much taking one day at a time and will probably need to begin pursuing this soon. It’s funny because I really don’t know what to do. I feel like I would love to be in full-time ministry, but I don’t know exactly what that means or even if that is what God has for me.
Please don’t get me wrong, it is good to catch up with people here and see people. I love Fellowship and look forward to getting plugged in there again. I would appreciate prayer in this time of transition.
Love in Him.
Sunday, December 9, 2007
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
A Work in Progress
On the second Sunday of each month, Jubilee Church has a church service in the prison, and last Sunday, Nov 11, I spoke there. As of Wednesday, I was feeling unworthy and not at all ready to speak. I was quite tempted to call or email Stephanie, who heads up this ministry, and ask if she could speak. This may sound strange, but I really felt like God wanted me to speak.
On Thursday, I sat down to begin to prepare something. Okay… I’m normally not this bad when it comes to preparing for things like this, but I was procrastinating on this one. So… back to Thursday… I began to sense that I was simply supposed to share about some of the stuff that God has been doing in me this year. Wow. It’s much easier to get up and just talk about something scriptural… but when it comes to your own issues, it is much harder to talk about. So, I told God that was fine if that is what He wanted me to do, but then didn’t prepare anything – I got up and began doing something else.
On Friday mornings, I am a part of a women’s prayer group. I told the gals where I was with the situation, but did not mention that I felt I was supposed to talk about my own situation. I told them that I was feeling quite small and unworthy to do this. They prayed with me and one of the girls (Cath) had two words for me.
The first was that she felt like God wanted me to speak on what He has done in me this year.
The second was a picture from a book that she has read to the young boy that she nannies for. In the beginning of the book, there are ten tall trees. One by one, they are chopped down, and all that is left at the end is a small acorn. The word went on a bit more, but this is all I am going to share for the purpose of this story.
Cath, felt like I came to South Africa kind of with or as ten tall trees. God has been chopping them down one at a time. They could represent a number of things – unbelief, things in my life that He wanted to cut out, things in my character that He didn’t want there any more, lies that I had believed, etc. And now, I am going home as this small acorn. Hence, why I feel SO small!!
On Friday afternoon, I sat down to begin working on my talk again, and I began to think about this word from Cath and what these ten tall trees may be. I came up with seven quite quickly… several lies that I had believed, an addiction that I had been struggling with, learning how to be a Mary in this world and the importance of that… and several others.
My talk went quite well on Sunday – God allowed His strength and power and presence to flow through me. He led me and gave me the strength that I didn’t have in myself to share these things. In being a small acorn and not feeling like I have much of myself, it allows God to do work through me so much more… without these random trees getting in the way. Am I perfect now? ABSOLUTELY NOT! I am a work in progress.
Phillipians 1:6 says : “… be confident of this, that He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”
He will continue to perfect me until the day that I meet Him. Hallelujah!!
…
My mom is coming to see me tomorrow! I am so excited. She should be getting on a flight from St. Louis in about two hours. We will have two weeks here together and then get a few days in Paris. I am so looking forward to seeing her, spending time with her and catching up! We will arrive in St. Louis on Saturday, December 1st in the evening and my very pregnant sister and brother-in-law are picking us up from the airport. I can’t wait to see her all pregnant… I can hardly stand it! I will be at Christian Fellowship on Sunday, December 2nd… probably will be quite jetlagged and quite out of it… but I will be there!
Thank you for all of your amazing support and encouragement this year. I can’t wait to see many of you and catch up in just a couple of weeks!!
As for my SA friends, in case any of you read this, I will miss you and will hope to see you before too long!!! You have been an amazing support to me this year and have truly been my family. Oh how I will miss Jubilee!!!
On Thursday, I sat down to begin to prepare something. Okay… I’m normally not this bad when it comes to preparing for things like this, but I was procrastinating on this one. So… back to Thursday… I began to sense that I was simply supposed to share about some of the stuff that God has been doing in me this year. Wow. It’s much easier to get up and just talk about something scriptural… but when it comes to your own issues, it is much harder to talk about. So, I told God that was fine if that is what He wanted me to do, but then didn’t prepare anything – I got up and began doing something else.
On Friday mornings, I am a part of a women’s prayer group. I told the gals where I was with the situation, but did not mention that I felt I was supposed to talk about my own situation. I told them that I was feeling quite small and unworthy to do this. They prayed with me and one of the girls (Cath) had two words for me.
The first was that she felt like God wanted me to speak on what He has done in me this year.
The second was a picture from a book that she has read to the young boy that she nannies for. In the beginning of the book, there are ten tall trees. One by one, they are chopped down, and all that is left at the end is a small acorn. The word went on a bit more, but this is all I am going to share for the purpose of this story.
Cath, felt like I came to South Africa kind of with or as ten tall trees. God has been chopping them down one at a time. They could represent a number of things – unbelief, things in my life that He wanted to cut out, things in my character that He didn’t want there any more, lies that I had believed, etc. And now, I am going home as this small acorn. Hence, why I feel SO small!!
On Friday afternoon, I sat down to begin working on my talk again, and I began to think about this word from Cath and what these ten tall trees may be. I came up with seven quite quickly… several lies that I had believed, an addiction that I had been struggling with, learning how to be a Mary in this world and the importance of that… and several others.
My talk went quite well on Sunday – God allowed His strength and power and presence to flow through me. He led me and gave me the strength that I didn’t have in myself to share these things. In being a small acorn and not feeling like I have much of myself, it allows God to do work through me so much more… without these random trees getting in the way. Am I perfect now? ABSOLUTELY NOT! I am a work in progress.
Phillipians 1:6 says : “… be confident of this, that He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”
He will continue to perfect me until the day that I meet Him. Hallelujah!!
…
My mom is coming to see me tomorrow! I am so excited. She should be getting on a flight from St. Louis in about two hours. We will have two weeks here together and then get a few days in Paris. I am so looking forward to seeing her, spending time with her and catching up! We will arrive in St. Louis on Saturday, December 1st in the evening and my very pregnant sister and brother-in-law are picking us up from the airport. I can’t wait to see her all pregnant… I can hardly stand it! I will be at Christian Fellowship on Sunday, December 2nd… probably will be quite jetlagged and quite out of it… but I will be there!
Thank you for all of your amazing support and encouragement this year. I can’t wait to see many of you and catch up in just a couple of weeks!!
As for my SA friends, in case any of you read this, I will miss you and will hope to see you before too long!!! You have been an amazing support to me this year and have truly been my family. Oh how I will miss Jubilee!!!
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
Coming to an End…
My time here in Cape Town is coming to an end very soon. Four weeks from today I fly out with my Mama. My mom is coming here two weeks from Thursday – November 15th. I am so excited to see her… it’s hard to believe it’s been almost six months! When I think about her coming, my stomach begins to have butterflies, as I am so excited!
My time with Dad and Robin was absolutely amazing! It was so nice to get to spend that time with them and to travel around with them. I fell in love with Zambia.... Victoria Falls is gorgeous... Kruger Park and the animals there living in their environment was astounding. What an amazing opportunity to get to do these things!
My emotions otherwise are a bit everywhere. I am getting very excited to come home and see family and friends and to go to Fellowship, but know I will miss it here too. It is funny how God has been preparing me to come home. I have been having random dreams of being home and seeing people. I also have an American friend here who is studying and doing her thesis on Americans in Africa, so she interviewed me to help her in thinking of different things. In doing this, I was reminded of so many things back home and even just re-realizing some of the big differences in culture between here and there. I think re-realizing some of these things and having these dreams will prepare me and hopefully make the adjustment back home easier.
Over the next three weeks, I am involved with the Restorative Justice II course in Pollsmoor Prison. I am looking forward to this, but am a bit scared of what God is going to bring out in me during this. When I helped with Restorative Justice I, I came home crying just about everyday and almost felt like I should be in the course rather than helping as a table leader. For the second course, we are doing an in-depth study on David’s life. I am very excited about it and would love prayer for me, the other table leaders, Jenny (the facilitator), and the inmates that are participating. Hope Ministries has put together a prayer request sheet, which I will cut and paste below.
I appreciate all of your support and prayers and look forward to seeing many of you in just a few weeks! May God bless you in abundance!
…………………………………..
HOPE PRISON MINISTRY
T O A L L I N T E R C E S S O R S
THE RESTORATIVE JUSTICE COURSE TWO with the Clients of Pollsmoor Female Correctional Centre starts on MONDAY 29th OCTOBER and finishes with the Family Day on SATURDAY 17th NOVEMBER 2007.
We, at Hope Prison Ministry, would sincerely appreciate your prayer cover during this time. This course is THREE WEEKS LONG. The theme for this second course is “DEALING WITH GUILT”. Please pray for:
THE INMATES/CLIENTS OF CORRECTIONAL SERVICES
● The 25 Clients who will be attending. Please pray for them by name.
Roxanne Helena Nyameka Rosina
Shameema Gloria Novuyo Yolanda
Karin Latecia Lindiwe Hestelene
Shelley Elcira Heidi Alecia
Adelia Loretta Nasheeba
Benita Nozibele Leslian
Iris Zukiswa Charlene
• For an openness to receive the content of the course. That God would prepare and soften hearts and minds.
● For those present to come into a relationship with the Lord. For total revelation of who God really is. That any head knowledge would become heart knowledge.
● For the content of this course to really hit the mark. That the inmates would grasp the truth of what is being taught and discussed. For life-giving revelation.
● For transparency from the inmates. For them to be open, sincere and honest in their response to the course.
● For the catering of lunch everyday for 40 plus people – Please pray for God's provision and for the preparation of these – this is a big task.
● For the daily venue of the course, as we may have to move venues.
• For the FAMILY DAY on Saturday 17th November. Please pray that the families of the clients attend and are open to respond appropriately.
FOR THE LEADER AND FACILITATORS – Please pray for us by name.
Leader of the course: JENNY CLAYTON
Names of Table Facilitators:
Table of Responsibility: Tania & Sue
Table of Confession: Mim & Veronica
Table of Repentance: Elizabeth & Luke
Table of Forgiveness: Dolly & Abigail
Table of Reconciliation: Marilyn, Doreen & Pam
Table of Restitution: Sarah, Angie and Mrs Fourie
There will be 6 tables, with 4 inmates at each (one table of 5) inmates with two facilitators per table.
● For wisdom, discernment, strength, courage, boldness and insight for Jenny Clayton, who will be leading this course and doing the majority of the talks over the three weeks. This is a supremely demanding role. Please pray that God will restore her strength on a daily basis.
● For God's protection over Jenny Clayton and the 13 Table Facilitators - physically, spiritually and emotionally. Also particular protection over our minds and over our relationships. This course is very intense, emotionally draining, and very demanding. Often at the end of a day the facilitator doesn't know quite where to put, or how to process what they have heard as the inmates unburden themselves.
● For the Facilitators: For wisdom, discernment, strength, courage, to be good listeners and good communicators. To know when to ask a question and when to remain quiet. To be able to draw out the quieter members of the table. For God’s love to shine out of the spiritual workers to the inmates.
We, as facilitators, have found in the past that the enemy will attack the following areas:
• FAMILY RELATIONSHIPS
• MARRIAGES
• HEALTH
• STRUGGLE BETWEEN BALANCING EXTENSIVE TIME SPENT ON COURSE VERSUS QUALITY TIME WITH CHILDREN/FAMILY
Also, please pray for:
• PEACEFUL, RESTORING SLEEP FOR THE WORKERS
• PROTECTION OVER OUR HOMES AND TRAVEL
• PROTECTION OVER OUR MINDS, against bad dreams etc
• TRANSPORT & TRANSPORT EXPENSES
• FOR UNITY WITHIN THE TEAM – this is so crucial
• FOR THE DEBRIEF DAY WITH THE CLIENTS ON MONDAY 19TH NOVEMBER. Please pray that the spiritual workers are sensitive to how God wants us to continue to minister to the clients in order to meet their on-going spiritual needs.
NOVEMBER IS RESTORATIVE JUSTICE MONTH AT POLLSMOOR PRISON. COURSES ARE ALSO BEING HELD IN THE MEN’S PRISON AND WITH THE AWAITING TRAIL JUVENILE BOYS – Please pray for them also. Thank you very much.
Please contact us if you have any questions or want an update.
Thank you in advance for your much valued prayer support.
Blessings,
Tania Holcroft, Restorative Justice Prayer Co-ordinator
My time with Dad and Robin was absolutely amazing! It was so nice to get to spend that time with them and to travel around with them. I fell in love with Zambia.... Victoria Falls is gorgeous... Kruger Park and the animals there living in their environment was astounding. What an amazing opportunity to get to do these things!
My emotions otherwise are a bit everywhere. I am getting very excited to come home and see family and friends and to go to Fellowship, but know I will miss it here too. It is funny how God has been preparing me to come home. I have been having random dreams of being home and seeing people. I also have an American friend here who is studying and doing her thesis on Americans in Africa, so she interviewed me to help her in thinking of different things. In doing this, I was reminded of so many things back home and even just re-realizing some of the big differences in culture between here and there. I think re-realizing some of these things and having these dreams will prepare me and hopefully make the adjustment back home easier.
Over the next three weeks, I am involved with the Restorative Justice II course in Pollsmoor Prison. I am looking forward to this, but am a bit scared of what God is going to bring out in me during this. When I helped with Restorative Justice I, I came home crying just about everyday and almost felt like I should be in the course rather than helping as a table leader. For the second course, we are doing an in-depth study on David’s life. I am very excited about it and would love prayer for me, the other table leaders, Jenny (the facilitator), and the inmates that are participating. Hope Ministries has put together a prayer request sheet, which I will cut and paste below.
I appreciate all of your support and prayers and look forward to seeing many of you in just a few weeks! May God bless you in abundance!
…………………………………..
HOPE PRISON MINISTRY
T O A L L I N T E R C E S S O R S
THE RESTORATIVE JUSTICE COURSE TWO with the Clients of Pollsmoor Female Correctional Centre starts on MONDAY 29th OCTOBER and finishes with the Family Day on SATURDAY 17th NOVEMBER 2007.
We, at Hope Prison Ministry, would sincerely appreciate your prayer cover during this time. This course is THREE WEEKS LONG. The theme for this second course is “DEALING WITH GUILT”. Please pray for:
THE INMATES/CLIENTS OF CORRECTIONAL SERVICES
● The 25 Clients who will be attending. Please pray for them by name.
Roxanne Helena Nyameka Rosina
Shameema Gloria Novuyo Yolanda
Karin Latecia Lindiwe Hestelene
Shelley Elcira Heidi Alecia
Adelia Loretta Nasheeba
Benita Nozibele Leslian
Iris Zukiswa Charlene
• For an openness to receive the content of the course. That God would prepare and soften hearts and minds.
● For those present to come into a relationship with the Lord. For total revelation of who God really is. That any head knowledge would become heart knowledge.
● For the content of this course to really hit the mark. That the inmates would grasp the truth of what is being taught and discussed. For life-giving revelation.
● For transparency from the inmates. For them to be open, sincere and honest in their response to the course.
● For the catering of lunch everyday for 40 plus people – Please pray for God's provision and for the preparation of these – this is a big task.
● For the daily venue of the course, as we may have to move venues.
• For the FAMILY DAY on Saturday 17th November. Please pray that the families of the clients attend and are open to respond appropriately.
FOR THE LEADER AND FACILITATORS – Please pray for us by name.
Leader of the course: JENNY CLAYTON
Names of Table Facilitators:
Table of Responsibility: Tania & Sue
Table of Confession: Mim & Veronica
Table of Repentance: Elizabeth & Luke
Table of Forgiveness: Dolly & Abigail
Table of Reconciliation: Marilyn, Doreen & Pam
Table of Restitution: Sarah, Angie and Mrs Fourie
There will be 6 tables, with 4 inmates at each (one table of 5) inmates with two facilitators per table.
● For wisdom, discernment, strength, courage, boldness and insight for Jenny Clayton, who will be leading this course and doing the majority of the talks over the three weeks. This is a supremely demanding role. Please pray that God will restore her strength on a daily basis.
● For God's protection over Jenny Clayton and the 13 Table Facilitators - physically, spiritually and emotionally. Also particular protection over our minds and over our relationships. This course is very intense, emotionally draining, and very demanding. Often at the end of a day the facilitator doesn't know quite where to put, or how to process what they have heard as the inmates unburden themselves.
● For the Facilitators: For wisdom, discernment, strength, courage, to be good listeners and good communicators. To know when to ask a question and when to remain quiet. To be able to draw out the quieter members of the table. For God’s love to shine out of the spiritual workers to the inmates.
We, as facilitators, have found in the past that the enemy will attack the following areas:
• FAMILY RELATIONSHIPS
• MARRIAGES
• HEALTH
• STRUGGLE BETWEEN BALANCING EXTENSIVE TIME SPENT ON COURSE VERSUS QUALITY TIME WITH CHILDREN/FAMILY
Also, please pray for:
• PEACEFUL, RESTORING SLEEP FOR THE WORKERS
• PROTECTION OVER OUR HOMES AND TRAVEL
• PROTECTION OVER OUR MINDS, against bad dreams etc
• TRANSPORT & TRANSPORT EXPENSES
• FOR UNITY WITHIN THE TEAM – this is so crucial
• FOR THE DEBRIEF DAY WITH THE CLIENTS ON MONDAY 19TH NOVEMBER. Please pray that the spiritual workers are sensitive to how God wants us to continue to minister to the clients in order to meet their on-going spiritual needs.
NOVEMBER IS RESTORATIVE JUSTICE MONTH AT POLLSMOOR PRISON. COURSES ARE ALSO BEING HELD IN THE MEN’S PRISON AND WITH THE AWAITING TRAIL JUVENILE BOYS – Please pray for them also. Thank you very much.
Please contact us if you have any questions or want an update.
Thank you in advance for your much valued prayer support.
Blessings,
Tania Holcroft, Restorative Justice Prayer Co-ordinator
Thursday, October 4, 2007
Time Goes by so Fast
It has been way too long since I have written on my blog! Time is going by so fast, it is so hard for me to believe I only have two more months here!
My Dad and Robin are actually on their way for a visit and will be here in just under four hours. I am so excited I can hardly contain myself! It’s going to be so exciting getting to show them around Cape Town and travel with them!
I have been doing well. We had our last training block over the last two weeks and it was amazing. It was quite hard to say goodbye to everyone, but hope to see them again someday. Training was good – we studied the book of Ephesians, talked about Eschatology, being a Christian in the Marketplace, Sex and Relationships and had time to wait on God in silence.
On Friday, Sept 21st, Jac, who leads fyp South Africa, took all 24 of us on the beach and spread us out there. We were in seeing distance of each other, for safety, but could not hear each other. We were allowed to take nothing – no Bible, no journal, no cell phone, no music, no watch, etc… only ourselves. He left us there for three hours and we were not to move from our own area unless we needed the restroom. It was such an amazing time. We just rested in God, listened for His voice, adored His creation, sang, cried out to Him, loved Him… it was amazing. Afterwards, we got together to debrief and we were each allowed one word to describe what the three hours was like… people gave words such as long, short, amazing, awesome, silence, secure, listening, hearing, interesting, adoring… it was such an amazing time.
We also did some team building activities to build our trust and confidence in each other and in ourselves. One thing we got to do was go abseiling… which is when you basically go rock climbing in reverse… I’m not sure what we call it there – maybe repelling? It was amazing and scary!
Sue (my housemate) and I went to our neighbors on Tuesday night for dinner. Anne is from Montana and William is from Senegal (sp?). Someone had asked Anne to write an article for a magazine called Alive Now and she felt like she had too much going on with writing her thesis and all, so she asked if I would be interested in doing it. It is simply about being a Christian here in South Africa. I am not even sure they will use it, but I have been working on it for the past couple of days and thought that I would put on here what I have so far. I don’t even have a title yet. ☺
Here it is:
As I was leaving Pollsmoor Prison this morning, I found myself walking out with an Africanz lady. She was walking to the front gate, which was about an eighth of a mile from the female section of the prison. She went ahead of me as I was getting in my car. I was driving by her just anticipating to pass her and yet found myself wondering why she was there… was it for counseling the ladies, to visit a friend or even a family member?
As I was passing her by, I heard a little voice in my head: “I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me” (Mathew 25:40). I stopped to see if she would like a lift as I prayed for God’s protection. I asked her where she was going, and she was going to take a taxi to the train station up the road. I went ahead and offered her a ride to the train station and took her there.
As we were traveling together, I found out she was visiting her 18-year old daughter who she had not seen for three weeks and had finally connected with her when she found out she was at Pollsmoor. This lady said that her daughter was a pretty good kid until her dad was murdered in 2001, and she had gone downhill ever since.
I have been in South Africa since January of this year and have been doing volunteer work for Jubilee Community Church in Observatory and also doing some work in Pollsmoor Prison. I have heard many stories like that of this lady… I have met a lady who killed her husband as she was saving her own life, I have met a lady who was drug trafficking to “provide” for her family, and I have met a lady who kidnapped a baby because she and her husband had been trying to get pregnant for nine years with no success.
As I meet with the ladies at Pollsmoor or when I see people begging on street corners here in Cape Town, I am reminded of a verse in Matthew 11 – Mary and Martha send word to Jesus regarding their brother Lazarus and his sickness. They tell Him, “Lord, the one you love is sick.” I love this verse. They are saying that Lazarus is the one that Jesus loves. Each one of these ladies at Pollsmoor, each one of these people begging on street corners, and each one of us is the one that Jesus loves.
South Africa is known for its high-crime rate and non-safety. It has been hard to live here at times, as the culture is very different than what I am used to. One of my friends here made a comment to me that I will never forget: “The safest place a person can be is in God’s will for their life.” No matter where God has called you or where He has you living, He is your Protector and you are safer with Him than anywhere else in the world.
My Dad and Robin are actually on their way for a visit and will be here in just under four hours. I am so excited I can hardly contain myself! It’s going to be so exciting getting to show them around Cape Town and travel with them!
I have been doing well. We had our last training block over the last two weeks and it was amazing. It was quite hard to say goodbye to everyone, but hope to see them again someday. Training was good – we studied the book of Ephesians, talked about Eschatology, being a Christian in the Marketplace, Sex and Relationships and had time to wait on God in silence.
On Friday, Sept 21st, Jac, who leads fyp South Africa, took all 24 of us on the beach and spread us out there. We were in seeing distance of each other, for safety, but could not hear each other. We were allowed to take nothing – no Bible, no journal, no cell phone, no music, no watch, etc… only ourselves. He left us there for three hours and we were not to move from our own area unless we needed the restroom. It was such an amazing time. We just rested in God, listened for His voice, adored His creation, sang, cried out to Him, loved Him… it was amazing. Afterwards, we got together to debrief and we were each allowed one word to describe what the three hours was like… people gave words such as long, short, amazing, awesome, silence, secure, listening, hearing, interesting, adoring… it was such an amazing time.
We also did some team building activities to build our trust and confidence in each other and in ourselves. One thing we got to do was go abseiling… which is when you basically go rock climbing in reverse… I’m not sure what we call it there – maybe repelling? It was amazing and scary!
Sue (my housemate) and I went to our neighbors on Tuesday night for dinner. Anne is from Montana and William is from Senegal (sp?). Someone had asked Anne to write an article for a magazine called Alive Now and she felt like she had too much going on with writing her thesis and all, so she asked if I would be interested in doing it. It is simply about being a Christian here in South Africa. I am not even sure they will use it, but I have been working on it for the past couple of days and thought that I would put on here what I have so far. I don’t even have a title yet. ☺
Here it is:
As I was leaving Pollsmoor Prison this morning, I found myself walking out with an Africanz lady. She was walking to the front gate, which was about an eighth of a mile from the female section of the prison. She went ahead of me as I was getting in my car. I was driving by her just anticipating to pass her and yet found myself wondering why she was there… was it for counseling the ladies, to visit a friend or even a family member?
As I was passing her by, I heard a little voice in my head: “I tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me” (Mathew 25:40). I stopped to see if she would like a lift as I prayed for God’s protection. I asked her where she was going, and she was going to take a taxi to the train station up the road. I went ahead and offered her a ride to the train station and took her there.
As we were traveling together, I found out she was visiting her 18-year old daughter who she had not seen for three weeks and had finally connected with her when she found out she was at Pollsmoor. This lady said that her daughter was a pretty good kid until her dad was murdered in 2001, and she had gone downhill ever since.
I have been in South Africa since January of this year and have been doing volunteer work for Jubilee Community Church in Observatory and also doing some work in Pollsmoor Prison. I have heard many stories like that of this lady… I have met a lady who killed her husband as she was saving her own life, I have met a lady who was drug trafficking to “provide” for her family, and I have met a lady who kidnapped a baby because she and her husband had been trying to get pregnant for nine years with no success.
As I meet with the ladies at Pollsmoor or when I see people begging on street corners here in Cape Town, I am reminded of a verse in Matthew 11 – Mary and Martha send word to Jesus regarding their brother Lazarus and his sickness. They tell Him, “Lord, the one you love is sick.” I love this verse. They are saying that Lazarus is the one that Jesus loves. Each one of these ladies at Pollsmoor, each one of these people begging on street corners, and each one of us is the one that Jesus loves.
South Africa is known for its high-crime rate and non-safety. It has been hard to live here at times, as the culture is very different than what I am used to. One of my friends here made a comment to me that I will never forget: “The safest place a person can be is in God’s will for their life.” No matter where God has called you or where He has you living, He is your Protector and you are safer with Him than anywhere else in the world.
Tuesday, August 28, 2007
Restorative Justice
Galatians 6:1-2 states, "Brothers, if someone is caught in a sin, you who are spiritual should restore him gently. But watch yourself, or you also may be tempted. Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ."
Wow. Restorative Justice has been amazing and yet very emotionally draining. I was reading Galatians 6 this morning and came across the above verse. First of all, I don't consider myself "spiritual" and secondly, I can hardly handle carrying my own sins and burdens, much less anyone else's!!! In the staff prayer meeting this morning at Jubilee, I just couldn't help but cry as I thought about Gloria and her burdens and struggles. I can't even imagine being where she is. I am so not qualified to even begin to help her through this. Yet I realize that it's not me, but God working through me.
In this course, I am "counseling" two ladies. I really just facilitate discussions and help lead them in the direction that the instructor is going. My two ladies are Latisha and Gloria, and they are both 33 years old. I love them both so dearly. They are so precious. My heart hurts for them.
We are having a family day at Pollsmoor (prison) this Saturday and I called Gloria's and Latisha's families to invite them. It was so amazing to get to talk to them and they are so excited about the course and the family day coming up. The family day is primarily for the ladies to apologize for the hurt that they have caused and to take responsibility in front of their families for the crimes they have committed. When I heard that the family day was just two weeks into the course, I was actually surprised and thinking that there is no way the ladies are going to be ready to apologize just two weeks into the course. Yet, by the second day of what I have realized is an incredibly intense and emotionally draining course, many of the ladies were crying and saying that they want to apologize to their families and restore those broken relationships.
One of the ladies in the course is a Muslim and four days into the course she had the revelation that our God is a God of relationship and a personal God, and she had never known that before.
I was asked to lead the morning devotion on the third day of the course. I had no idea what to talk about and was not feeling any direction from God. At the last minute, I decided just to share part of my testimony. I brought in the famous verses of Jeremiah 29:11-13, along with several others. When I was finished sharing, one of the other leaders wanted to say something... she said that the night before she could hardly sleep because those verses were continually going through her head. She almost came in that morning and asked if she could do the devotion because she felt like that's what God wanted to talk about. After she was finished, the lady leading the course, Jenny, said that that verse was continually going through her head, as well, and she had a song that was those verses being sung and she had found the CD to play and planned to play it later during the day... but she went ahead and played the song in the morning, since we had been discussing it. We then went into an amazing time of worship for about 30 minutes. Wow. He's amazing... God is continuing to surprise me this year.
I am feeling incredibly drained and not even sure how to go about "filling up my tank". I have learned one interesting thing (among others, of course) in the last few months. I was involved with intercessory prayer during our youth camp and was telling one of the other prayers that I almost don't know what to do or how to intercede for these meetings. She said that as God works in me, He will outpour through me and into praying for them. Also, while I was in the training for the Restorative Justice course, the leader (Jenny) said that we should just let God work in us and, as a result of Him working in us, He will outpour through us. Seems obvious, but was a revelation to me! And, it takes some of the pressure off! :)
Also an update that I no longer have a car... the car that I have been driving has been acting up more and more and the cost to fix it just isn't worth it. If we can sell it, the church will put some money in and purchase another vehicle for volunteers to use while they are here. I went to Pollsmoor yesterday by public transport, which was interesting, but not bad. It took a little over an hour for me to get there... here's my journey: 10 minute walk from flat to train station, 35ish minutes on train, from train station got a taxi and it's about a 10-minute ride to Pollsmoor, and then about a 10-minute walk to training center. Two ladies that are also in the course met me at the train station and we took the taxi and the walk together, which is quite good. It is actually quite a bit cheaper than having a car, as petrol is SO expensive here.
Love you all so much!
Wow. Restorative Justice has been amazing and yet very emotionally draining. I was reading Galatians 6 this morning and came across the above verse. First of all, I don't consider myself "spiritual" and secondly, I can hardly handle carrying my own sins and burdens, much less anyone else's!!! In the staff prayer meeting this morning at Jubilee, I just couldn't help but cry as I thought about Gloria and her burdens and struggles. I can't even imagine being where she is. I am so not qualified to even begin to help her through this. Yet I realize that it's not me, but God working through me.
In this course, I am "counseling" two ladies. I really just facilitate discussions and help lead them in the direction that the instructor is going. My two ladies are Latisha and Gloria, and they are both 33 years old. I love them both so dearly. They are so precious. My heart hurts for them.
We are having a family day at Pollsmoor (prison) this Saturday and I called Gloria's and Latisha's families to invite them. It was so amazing to get to talk to them and they are so excited about the course and the family day coming up. The family day is primarily for the ladies to apologize for the hurt that they have caused and to take responsibility in front of their families for the crimes they have committed. When I heard that the family day was just two weeks into the course, I was actually surprised and thinking that there is no way the ladies are going to be ready to apologize just two weeks into the course. Yet, by the second day of what I have realized is an incredibly intense and emotionally draining course, many of the ladies were crying and saying that they want to apologize to their families and restore those broken relationships.
One of the ladies in the course is a Muslim and four days into the course she had the revelation that our God is a God of relationship and a personal God, and she had never known that before.
I was asked to lead the morning devotion on the third day of the course. I had no idea what to talk about and was not feeling any direction from God. At the last minute, I decided just to share part of my testimony. I brought in the famous verses of Jeremiah 29:11-13, along with several others. When I was finished sharing, one of the other leaders wanted to say something... she said that the night before she could hardly sleep because those verses were continually going through her head. She almost came in that morning and asked if she could do the devotion because she felt like that's what God wanted to talk about. After she was finished, the lady leading the course, Jenny, said that that verse was continually going through her head, as well, and she had a song that was those verses being sung and she had found the CD to play and planned to play it later during the day... but she went ahead and played the song in the morning, since we had been discussing it. We then went into an amazing time of worship for about 30 minutes. Wow. He's amazing... God is continuing to surprise me this year.
I am feeling incredibly drained and not even sure how to go about "filling up my tank". I have learned one interesting thing (among others, of course) in the last few months. I was involved with intercessory prayer during our youth camp and was telling one of the other prayers that I almost don't know what to do or how to intercede for these meetings. She said that as God works in me, He will outpour through me and into praying for them. Also, while I was in the training for the Restorative Justice course, the leader (Jenny) said that we should just let God work in us and, as a result of Him working in us, He will outpour through us. Seems obvious, but was a revelation to me! And, it takes some of the pressure off! :)
Also an update that I no longer have a car... the car that I have been driving has been acting up more and more and the cost to fix it just isn't worth it. If we can sell it, the church will put some money in and purchase another vehicle for volunteers to use while they are here. I went to Pollsmoor yesterday by public transport, which was interesting, but not bad. It took a little over an hour for me to get there... here's my journey: 10 minute walk from flat to train station, 35ish minutes on train, from train station got a taxi and it's about a 10-minute ride to Pollsmoor, and then about a 10-minute walk to training center. Two ladies that are also in the course met me at the train station and we took the taxi and the walk together, which is quite good. It is actually quite a bit cheaper than having a car, as petrol is SO expensive here.
Love you all so much!
Sunday, August 19, 2007
Three and One-half Months to Go!!!
Hello everyone! Wow… the last few weeks have been quite hard for me – I know that God is working in me, so it’s good, it’s just been hard. I have felt quite alone and have been stressed by trying to be in control of my life and my future. God is continuing to draw me closer to Him and I now have a peace about following where I believe He is taking me for the next season of my life – home! Each day I am getting more excited about coming home to my family and friends and Fellowship, but I am also treasuring each day that I have left here in beautiful Cape Town. I am continually broken for this city and the people here.
I only have three and one-half months left here – it’s so hard to believe and I’m sure it will go by SO fast. Here is a breakdown of my schedule for the next three and one-half months:
Aug 20 – Sept 4: Restorative Justice (explained more below) along with regular church work (bookshop, youth, Beauty for Ashes)
Sept 5: Maggie’s 30th birthday!!! Wish I could be there to celebrate!!! (Had to put this in here.)
Sept 5 – Sept 16: Normal life at Jubilee Community Church.
Sept 17 – Sept 28: Training block.
Sept 29: Young adult formal – shall be fun but I don’t have a dress!!!
Sept 29 – Oct 3: Normal life at Jubilee.
Oct 4 – Oct 11: Dad and Robin visiting Cape Town! YEAH!!!
Oct 12 – Oct 20: Travel to Johannesburg, Victoria Falls (Zambia side) and Kruegar Park with Dad and Robin. So excited!
Oct 21 – Oct 28: Normal life at Jubilee
Oct 29 – Nov 17: Restorative Justice at Pollsmoor.
Nov 18: Done with program. Hoping and praying for mom to come and visit for a bit and maybe travel some with her before heading home!
For life now, as many of you know, I have been house-sitting and I return to the flat tomorrow. I will miss the house and the nice car, but am ready to get settled again at the flat and have my housemate around.
I am starting something new this week at the prison, which I am quite excited about. They offer a course to the inmates for them to take before they are released from prison. It is called Restorative Justice and I will be helping with some of the facilitating and will also have two women inmates that I will be working closely with. The course is a six-week course. We meet three to four days a week from August 20th to September 4th and again from October 29th to November 17th. It helps the inmates to deal with the crime they committed and helps them to take responsibility for it and to forgive themselves and others involved, and encourages them to ask forgiveness to those affected by their crime. It is quite intense. We even bring the families in on September 1st for the inmates to talk with them regarding the crime. I am so grateful to have the opportunity to be a part of this and pray that God uses me and directs me with the women I will be working with.
It is actually quite funny because I have known about this course the whole year and was really hoping I could be a part of it. I was speaking with Jenny, the lady who runs the course, last Wednesday and she said that she thinks they have enough workers, and that I probably wouldn’t be needed. I told her that I really would love the opportunity to be involved and help out in any way that I can. She said she would let me know on Thursday and I found out that I could be a part of it! I met with her on Friday and she told me that she wasn’t going to have me help out, but since I said that I really wanted to, she made it work – she said that she wants people who are passionate about this and have a heart for it. I am so thankful that God gave me the boldness to even step out and tell her that I really wanted to be a part of it! I normally would have just sat back and let whatever happen happen and trust that it was God’s will.
There is a specific prayer letter which was written by the ministry in the prison for prayer support for this course, and I am going to copy and paste it at the end of this post. I would appreciate any and all prayer for this.
Thank you all for your support – prayer, financial, emotional, Spiritual. I don’t know what I would do without all of you back home! Love you all!
Dear Prayers,
We would be so grateful if you would please pray for the Restorative Justice Course that is being held in the prison at Pollsmoor.
Prayer cover for this program is crucial and we would really appreciate your support in prayer – thank you.
1. The theme of this course is Healing the Wounds of Crime.
2. The primary goal of Restorative Justice is the address and confront the harm caused by crime.
3. We will be confronting, discussing and addressing the damaged and broken relationships caused by the crime.
4. Further points of discussion are: taking responsibility for past and future action, confession, repentance, forgiveness, restitution, reconciliation and accountability.
Please pray for:
1. The inmates who will be involved (24 inmates – all women).
2. For Jenny Clayton (Director of Hope Prison Ministry) who will be leading this course. Please pray for strength for her, as well as wisdom, discernment and protection. (There is a vast amount of work involved before, during and after this course.)
3. Please pray for the Spiritual Workers who will be facilitating each group (this is me along will 11 others).
4. Please pray that the Spiritual Workers can get to the prison each day – for transport (many take public transport).
5. Please pray for the logistics of the venue, catering, and every practical aspect.
6. Please pray for safety and protection and for our families too.
7. Please pray for restoration and reconciliation of relationships that have been damaged by crime.
8. Please pray for the family day on the 1st of September. Family members are invited to attend. The inmates speak about what they have learnt during the course. The inmate may seek forgiveness from family present and in many cases this is expressed. This is hugely powerful.
Thank you so much for your much valued prayers.
Tania Holcroft
Sprititual Worker, Hope Prison Ministry, Pollsmoor Prison.
I only have three and one-half months left here – it’s so hard to believe and I’m sure it will go by SO fast. Here is a breakdown of my schedule for the next three and one-half months:
Aug 20 – Sept 4: Restorative Justice (explained more below) along with regular church work (bookshop, youth, Beauty for Ashes)
Sept 5: Maggie’s 30th birthday!!! Wish I could be there to celebrate!!! (Had to put this in here.)
Sept 5 – Sept 16: Normal life at Jubilee Community Church.
Sept 17 – Sept 28: Training block.
Sept 29: Young adult formal – shall be fun but I don’t have a dress!!!
Sept 29 – Oct 3: Normal life at Jubilee.
Oct 4 – Oct 11: Dad and Robin visiting Cape Town! YEAH!!!
Oct 12 – Oct 20: Travel to Johannesburg, Victoria Falls (Zambia side) and Kruegar Park with Dad and Robin. So excited!
Oct 21 – Oct 28: Normal life at Jubilee
Oct 29 – Nov 17: Restorative Justice at Pollsmoor.
Nov 18: Done with program. Hoping and praying for mom to come and visit for a bit and maybe travel some with her before heading home!
For life now, as many of you know, I have been house-sitting and I return to the flat tomorrow. I will miss the house and the nice car, but am ready to get settled again at the flat and have my housemate around.
I am starting something new this week at the prison, which I am quite excited about. They offer a course to the inmates for them to take before they are released from prison. It is called Restorative Justice and I will be helping with some of the facilitating and will also have two women inmates that I will be working closely with. The course is a six-week course. We meet three to four days a week from August 20th to September 4th and again from October 29th to November 17th. It helps the inmates to deal with the crime they committed and helps them to take responsibility for it and to forgive themselves and others involved, and encourages them to ask forgiveness to those affected by their crime. It is quite intense. We even bring the families in on September 1st for the inmates to talk with them regarding the crime. I am so grateful to have the opportunity to be a part of this and pray that God uses me and directs me with the women I will be working with.
It is actually quite funny because I have known about this course the whole year and was really hoping I could be a part of it. I was speaking with Jenny, the lady who runs the course, last Wednesday and she said that she thinks they have enough workers, and that I probably wouldn’t be needed. I told her that I really would love the opportunity to be involved and help out in any way that I can. She said she would let me know on Thursday and I found out that I could be a part of it! I met with her on Friday and she told me that she wasn’t going to have me help out, but since I said that I really wanted to, she made it work – she said that she wants people who are passionate about this and have a heart for it. I am so thankful that God gave me the boldness to even step out and tell her that I really wanted to be a part of it! I normally would have just sat back and let whatever happen happen and trust that it was God’s will.
There is a specific prayer letter which was written by the ministry in the prison for prayer support for this course, and I am going to copy and paste it at the end of this post. I would appreciate any and all prayer for this.
Thank you all for your support – prayer, financial, emotional, Spiritual. I don’t know what I would do without all of you back home! Love you all!
Dear Prayers,
We would be so grateful if you would please pray for the Restorative Justice Course that is being held in the prison at Pollsmoor.
Prayer cover for this program is crucial and we would really appreciate your support in prayer – thank you.
1. The theme of this course is Healing the Wounds of Crime.
2. The primary goal of Restorative Justice is the address and confront the harm caused by crime.
3. We will be confronting, discussing and addressing the damaged and broken relationships caused by the crime.
4. Further points of discussion are: taking responsibility for past and future action, confession, repentance, forgiveness, restitution, reconciliation and accountability.
Please pray for:
1. The inmates who will be involved (24 inmates – all women).
2. For Jenny Clayton (Director of Hope Prison Ministry) who will be leading this course. Please pray for strength for her, as well as wisdom, discernment and protection. (There is a vast amount of work involved before, during and after this course.)
3. Please pray for the Spiritual Workers who will be facilitating each group (this is me along will 11 others).
4. Please pray that the Spiritual Workers can get to the prison each day – for transport (many take public transport).
5. Please pray for the logistics of the venue, catering, and every practical aspect.
6. Please pray for safety and protection and for our families too.
7. Please pray for restoration and reconciliation of relationships that have been damaged by crime.
8. Please pray for the family day on the 1st of September. Family members are invited to attend. The inmates speak about what they have learnt during the course. The inmate may seek forgiveness from family present and in many cases this is expressed. This is hugely powerful.
Thank you so much for your much valued prayers.
Tania Holcroft
Sprititual Worker, Hope Prison Ministry, Pollsmoor Prison.
Friday, August 10, 2007
Hello Everyone!
Hello! I have been doing quite well - have had a bit of a stressful week, but that's okay! We are having a women's breakfast here tomorrow morning, which I am quite excited about. We will have breakfast together and then a few ladies will share testimonies and we'll have some worship time at the end. Herma, who is heading this up, asked me to be in charge of the admin and the decorations, so I am quite excited! We were expecting about 50 to 70 ladies to sign up, and we have over 220 - wow!!! This is the first women's event that they have had, so it is quite exciting and, by the response, it shows that this is needed! I have a team helping me here at the church tonight, which is wonderful.
I actually have youth tonight, as well, and we are spliting into life groups - I help lead the 10th graders. So, we are using this opportunity to teach on serving and then have the kids put this to practice by helping set out tables and chairs and stuff. That is such a blessing to me and I hope that it blesses them as they serve together.
On another note, on Wednesday we met with a lady at the prison who is one of the administrators there. We presented a program to her that we are wanting to implement in the prison. It is a wellness program, and we would teach the inmates about health, nutrition, exercise, sti's, hiv, parenting, etc. I am very excited about this! We do not yet have approval, but should here back soon from the prison. Our plan is to begin this in the women's section and then begin teaching it in the men's and kid's sections, as well. Please pray for favor from the administrators and a venue to use there.
I am also going into the prison this Sunday for church. My life group (small group) is going with me, so I am quite excited to get to take them in and show them what I am a part of and have them meet some of the ladies there. One of my life group leaders, Nico, is preaching and my old housemate, Craig, is leading worship. Please pray that God meets with us, uses us and directs us.
I am still housesitting and will be for a little over a week. It has been amazing having the house and car and know it will be hard to give it up! :) I love how God not only provides what we need, but He provides so much more!!! He continues to bless me, amaze me, astound me, excite me... and I could go on.
Things at the flat are okay - we have a new security gate, and should be getting a new door soon.
I have been getting emails from many people and have not had much opportunity to respond as I don't have email where I'm staying. I apologize and will do so as soon as I can!
Love you all and miss you!
I actually have youth tonight, as well, and we are spliting into life groups - I help lead the 10th graders. So, we are using this opportunity to teach on serving and then have the kids put this to practice by helping set out tables and chairs and stuff. That is such a blessing to me and I hope that it blesses them as they serve together.
On another note, on Wednesday we met with a lady at the prison who is one of the administrators there. We presented a program to her that we are wanting to implement in the prison. It is a wellness program, and we would teach the inmates about health, nutrition, exercise, sti's, hiv, parenting, etc. I am very excited about this! We do not yet have approval, but should here back soon from the prison. Our plan is to begin this in the women's section and then begin teaching it in the men's and kid's sections, as well. Please pray for favor from the administrators and a venue to use there.
I am also going into the prison this Sunday for church. My life group (small group) is going with me, so I am quite excited to get to take them in and show them what I am a part of and have them meet some of the ladies there. One of my life group leaders, Nico, is preaching and my old housemate, Craig, is leading worship. Please pray that God meets with us, uses us and directs us.
I am still housesitting and will be for a little over a week. It has been amazing having the house and car and know it will be hard to give it up! :) I love how God not only provides what we need, but He provides so much more!!! He continues to bless me, amaze me, astound me, excite me... and I could go on.
Things at the flat are okay - we have a new security gate, and should be getting a new door soon.
I have been getting emails from many people and have not had much opportunity to respond as I don't have email where I'm staying. I apologize and will do so as soon as I can!
Love you all and miss you!
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